Yesterday I wrote a post feeling VERY sorry for myself. The gist of it was that I'm homesick, but I expanded on the theme for a while. I posted it and then when I re-read it, it was so self-indulgent that I just had to scrap it and start again. The theme of that post was - woe is me, how homesick I am! But while acknowledging that I am homesick, maybe it's more constructive to say WHY I am homesick. So I'm going to copy a wonderful friend's example, and tell you about the very special people I have in my life, and I think this will help to explain why I might feel homesick when they're far from me.
1. Mum (who should always come first in every list). Who can say what a blessing it is to have a mother who is simultaneously incredibly capable, full of good sense, funny, kind and a wonderful daughter of God? My mother does NOT like to talk about herself very much and will hate me a bit for this, but golly I'm glad to have her. She tells me funny stories about what the dog is doing, about her work as a school chaplain, about what's happening at church - and when I think about the way she talks about all these things I think, what a big heart she has. I am so glad to be her daughter. I have literally never wished for a different or 'better' mum. And perhaps I go my own way and perhaps I don't really look like I'm listening when she gives advice .... But what she says always has some impact. She always thinks of what is best for us - so when I had second thoughts and thought about staying in Australia because I was afraid, she said "I don't want you to go but I think you'll always regret it if you don't." What a mother.
2. Sisters (so different in who they are and also in our relationships, but I can't put one first or it looks like favourites). One is a mother of three who is also writing a novel. Um, what? How is that possible? THREE children AND a novel. Amazing. The other is a 13 year old who I have seen grow from a baby, who is such a big part of my own life and so important to our whole extended family that sometimes I think we couldn't exist without her. Also we are all identical.
3. Grandparents. A year or two ago they celebrated 50 years of marriage. They are such a faithful couple in serving the Lord, loving their family and caring for the people around them. And in September, they're going for a cruise through Russia to celebrate being nearly 80. I want to be these people when I'm nearly 80. They are amazing.
4. Friends. One best friend studying and working in Adelaide whose passion and fun and depth and frivolity make me laugh and think and be oh so grateful always. Another getting ready to move to Johannesburg to be an OT whose infectious personality and gorgeous smile and do-anything approach to life are something beautiful to behold - who also gave me the gift of the ukulele (the actual instrument and the ability to play it) and the inspiration for the musical voicemail. Another living out her dream job in Canberra and Darwin, with whom I've shared the details of life through emails for the past 6 years, and who has provided the soundtrack to my life through her mix tapes. Another who is grace and style personified, a feisty, passionate thinker who is equally committed to living thoughtfully and to having fun - and who really ought to move to England as she keeps thinking of doing! And SO many more. I have been so blessed with friends.
So yes, I am homesick. But I'm also so thankful. I could never be homesick if I wasn't unbelievably blessed; just as I'll miss Cambridge terribly when I move on, because I'm so blessed in my life here.
Next time I'll be back to a whimsical list but it's sometimes nice to talk about my feelings.
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